Now is My Time


It’s funny how much twelve  pieces of paper can communicate…how just a few words scribbled here and there on them bring back a whole different era.

I keep looking at the calendar I found months ago at Mom’s. It’s from 1978, and it tells so many stories. It tells big stories like my high school graduation and the birth of Mom’s first grandchild and the death of her daddy.

It brings back the days when one brother was in junior high and the other in first grade. And Mom notes sore throats, dental appointments, photo days, conferences and activities…all those myriad of details that make up the life of a mother caring for her children.

And I see notes of her reupholstering home business and her sewing projects.  I see she figured out taxes for my older brother and me. I see plans she had with friends and favors she did for neighbors and when Dad started a new job. I see words about church and serving there.

There is so much life and history represented by those scribbles on twelve pieces of paper. And those scribbles bring back so many sweet memories of my dear mama when she was at her prime… healthy and active and brilliant and loving all those around her.

And I look at my own calendar hanging on my wall. I see the scribbles that have started filling up this month. And I realize that now is my time. Now is my opportunity to fill those twelve sheets of paper and all those little squares with scribbles that represent love and energy used to bless and care for those around me.

Now is my year to plan my own daughter’s graduation party. Now is my year to rejoice in another son’s wedding. Now is my time to pour love into the lives of my parents while they are still with me. Now is my time to faithfully follow God and do the work He has called me to do.  Now is my time to handle all the humble details of life that end up reflecting a heart that cares.

Now is my time to draw close to Jesus and learn to walk closely with Him. Now is my time to share His love with others.

Now is my time.

And I pray that someday my children will look back at my old calendar and see the scribbles I left there and remember a mom that loved God and loved them with energy and heart. And I’m thankful I have such memories of my own mama.

“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12


Why I Can’t Throw Away the Calendar From 1978

I  was cleaning my closet a while back, and found a box of photos and odds and ends I’d rescued from Dad before he threw it away. Much of it I did end up tossing—old maps, unidentified photos of people I didn’t recognize, etc. But I keep looking at the calendar from 1978, and I can’t bring myself to throw it out. It’s covered with little notes of things that happened that year and reminders of birthdays and appointments.  It’s a time capsule, taking me back to that year when I was a senior in high school, and I had a brother in grade school, another in junior high, and an older one who had just become a daddy himself.

It reminds me of the mama I had…the one who was a room-mother, who was driving kids to church, sewing and upholstering for people, meeting friends for lunch, and taking kids to the dentist, the doctor, and even the hospital. It shows the mama that was babysitting her first grandson, the same year that she took a bus to Louisiana to sit by her own dying daddy. Such a loving, capable mama who was so easy to take for granted.

It reminds me to look at my own calendar, and contemplate how I am using my days.  While I have the health and strength and mind, am I using my days in the most valuable ways? While I still have some of my children at home, and all of them close by, am I making the most of our time together?  While my parents are still living, am I taking every opportunity to show them love and gratitude? Am I filling my days with God’s purpose for me?

“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12